Yesterday I was cycling in Richmond Park, vague memories of being then mixing with experiences of being now, strangely exhilarating in a contemplative way.
Warm restless nights leave me with thoughts and feelings closer to dreams, vague feelings, atmospheres, here and there entangled.
Morning walking / writings, a practice of being old, an untold, this unravelling, travelling, back and forth through times, and spaces. An acre of land comes to mind. A hockey pitch, on the Bank of England Sports Ground, I used to run round it, it was play, not unlike now, with this start of the day.
When I was a kid, running around The Grounds I was told the hockey pitch was just over an acre in size, I got to know hockey pitches, football fields, and the 440 yards running track that I ran around in the summer. I got to know an 'acre'. At the same time as I run around and across these spaces, I get to know my self, this imperceptible knowing that forms and shapes my being, my life. The word 'acre' gradually faded as my feeling for those spaces and times became my form of 'knowing'.
This day, the coffee, water, finished, a photographer does a 'pan-o-rama' for the hotel web site, crockery and cutlery being washed up behind me, familiar music playing, don't know what it is called, just know it, for my self. Naming, words, ways of reflecting upon knowing, my playing, these contemplations, articulated onto a page in a notebook, articulated on this iPhone screen. This being of self becoming less imperceptible. This (that) presence forming, taking shape, in another way, these words.
This play for today comes to an end, like running around a field, running around a 440 yard track, a game of football, a cycle round the park. This encounter with an imperceptible self. Now, into a day of decay, to be dreamed through night, mulched, crunched, awaiting .. forming, shaping, being, alive